Solid March of the Misfit

Enduring the heat on her face,
It grew from a flame years ago,
Her fears, his hatred, their space,
Has destroyed parts of her ego.

It grew from a flame years ago,
Their blazing flame has espoused it;
Has destroyed parts of her ego,
With a solid march of the misfit.

Their blazing flame has espoused it,
Her fears, his hatred, their space,
With a solid march of the misfit,
Enduring the heat on her face.

((by Amina Caprice Andolini¬†ūüĎĹ))



The Universe (all Soulmates):
Take the typical classroom (typical desks, no long tables or other little things,) inside the classrooms there are classmates – the whole class – ones who sit closest to us, to the left, right, front and back, depending on how the classroom is made. ¬†They can represent a biological family, Soul Family, close friend, other… They all represent soulmates. ¬†Now, in the classroom, those who sit closest to us represent the close kind of soulmates we hear about all the time.

Not everyone will share a desk, their notes and books in every classroom, but for those of us who do, the person we share our desk and ALL our belongings with is the one  we call an Eternal Soulmate or Twin Flame.

We attempt to explain or understand the Source and His Creations in different ways (such as Teal Swan’s deal with the ocean and its waves, and others who talk about the sun’s rays). ¬†For me, knowing the sense of closeness I feel for some could mean that a certain Being is in the same class (Soul Family/classmate) as me explains a lot. ¬†Not everybody we feel close to is a Twin Flame or a soulmate that we’re destined to spend eternity with. ¬†We have very close friends, friends we’ve sat next to in class and had active communication (lifetimes) with for… who knows how long.

We are all Beings learning and growing together, no matter what dimension we currently live in. ¬†We are all Beings learning and growing together, no matter what role we’re currently playing. ¬†We all are soulmates.


Divine Jealousy – a Twin Flame Thing

I finally found someone like me. ¬†I should be happy, right? ¬†Nope… I had the nerve to get¬†skeptical. ¬†I started to contact the chick but chickened out. ¬†Why, when she explained some of the same things I went through in the beginning? ¬†Well, it’s not that I don’t believe her, but something does bother me. ¬†This has nothing to do with her – not really. ¬†The something is the fact that it took me several years to fully deal and heal the scar tissue, but it only took her about five months. ¬†What thuh! ¬†And probably even shorter than that. ¬†This girl had to have been awakened for a while before she met her Twin. ¬†Look, I know it doesn’t really mean anything. ¬†I’m aware that I had a lot of issues; a lot of baggage to get out the way before I was ready to accept the ascended Twin jazz (what I call the Twin Flame Oddity). ¬†Because of all the baggage, I know, it took much longer for me. ¬†See, it has nothing to do with her; however, the way she handled news so big is interesting.

The thing is, it took me so long to come to grips with this stuff; I’ve been walking this path for so long, that I’m used to it. I’m used to being along in this situation; I’m used to the people around me not understanding, not speaking on it, questioning my sanity or supporting me from afar. ¬†Yeah, I wanna to reach out, but I’m kinda scared to reach out. ¬†Why am I afraid? ¬†At first it was because I didn’t want people calling me a liar or what’s worse, calling my Angels a bunch of demons, treating me as if I don’t know the difference between them and basically belittling everything I’ve ever been through in this lifetime. ¬†I was terrified of people judging me, but now, I’m way past the doubtful stage. ¬†I know what I experienced then and what I’m experiencing now.

I’m kinda afraid because I’ve held this stuff so close, that in some ways, it has become my selfish little fantasy. ¬†For now, I control it. ¬†I can guard it, lock it up, and play around with it as I see fit. ¬†For the longest, I didn’t want anyone to share it. ¬†I don’t want to share him, though he belongs to the world anyway – folks made him a one dimensional creature way before I came to Earth. ¬†Even when I didn’t know who he was to me, there were times when I didn’t like some people’s version of him, but what can I do? ¬†So what. ¬†I can do nothing but deal with it. ¬†I can’t control other people, only myself and other things to a point. ¬†Yep, I had to deal with airs of misconception. ¬†I had to deal with his guilt and his tortured artist jazz. ¬†I had to deal with his mess along with my mess – my guilt and tortured artist jazz. ¬†It took me so long to deal.

This divine jealousy is just one of the things that messed me up big time. ¬†I wonder how she dealt with “mess” so fast? ¬†Or, since her Twin was a genius, a beacon/light worker, and almost at the level of being a Guru when he walked Earth, I wonder if that’s why there wasn’t as much shock for her. ¬†I don’t know. ¬†I don’t care. ¬†Good for her (really). ¬†Yet and still, I hope to reach out and/or meet up with people like me very soon. ¬†We are Blue Ray Twin Flames (or Red Rays), according to Patricia McNeilly, an Illumined Blue Ray Twin Flame from Chicago, Illinois.

Two Simple Reasons – CLAIREMPATHS, Know Your Native Tongue!

I already felt like some animal at a sideshow because of the merge. ¬†Some say you shouldn’t do it; however, I’m not the one who orchestrated the move. ¬†It just appeared one day – they all flared up when my Twin Flame arrived.

I have learned that all stages of empath development are important. ¬†The problem comes in when an empath doesn’t know what’s going on AT ALL. ¬†When some beat up on the super sensitive empath, telling them that their untrained ability isn’t much of an ability at all, that their feelings of not belonging are invalid; that basically, they are worthless.

I don’t know what stage of development I’m currently in. ¬†I don’t feel like a Skilled Empath (probably because I’m not interested in becoming one yet); however, I don’t experience as many of the uncomfortable things that I did in the past. ¬†These are some of the things that helped me deal with the untrained or “unskilled empath” symptoms (may or may not work for others)…

It’s important for an empath to find out what kind of empath they are – to find out how they process information. ¬†As far as I am concerned, if I had never found out of my language, I would have still been in some kind of box, wondering what’s wrong with me. ¬†For me, it felt like empowerment. ¬†Finally! ¬†I can concentrate on becoming a Skilled Empath (whenever), concentrate on a career (the mission) or onto helping others. ¬†I feel safe enough to move on to the next step.

Finally! ¬†Something makes so much sense to me. ¬†After spending so long feeling like some weird alien in an ugly human suit, this is BIG news. ¬†To me, “naming myself” armed me with the proper weapons. ¬†I no longer felt as helpless. ¬†Putting a name to this case made sense out of the things I’d been seeing around me for several years. ¬†It may or may not be technical, but to me, it just made sense!

Spiritual Bass – Twin Flame Oddity

What Exactly Is a Twin Flame (Quickly)?
From my understanding, a Twin Flame is an Eternal Soulmate.  Someone known on the Other Side, from past lives, someone you have made a contract with to be with forever.  Obviously, Twin Flames have been together since the beginning, they are the same Soul, split in some way, guiding each other, looking to meet up again.

Not everybody has a Twin Flame. ¬†In fact, some should be grateful for that – it hurts too much when separated. ¬†It is not one of those regular soulmate relationships, full of roses and lollipops, happily living life in the Matrix. ¬†The relationship I speak of isn’t one where Twin Flames fight it out on the same plane either. ¬†This is some of my experience with Twin Flame Oddity, which is a Twin Flame connection made while one is on another plane (or not in physical form).

Sixteen Things About This Oddity
On top of all the other stuff, I am now going through every sign and symptom of a Twin Flame meeting. ¬†I couldn’t believe it. ¬†I couldn’t believe this dude was getting it done from another plane. ¬†I was shocked… Incredible! ¬†I had never heard of anything like this in my life.

  1. After this dude told me his name, I was floored.  I could not believe he was my Twin Flame because we look so different physically, well, when he walked Earth we looked different.  There is a significant age gap; most everything seems to be the opposite externally; however, there are some similarities Рsome startling.

  2. There was a pull unlike anything I’d ever been through. ¬†he drew me through words, words that I just knew were for me. ¬†it was only then that I felt insane. ¬†I didn’t care about the Guide, the soulmate, the creepy stuff, I thought all that stuff was cool, but after he showed me those words and a bunch of websites that focused on Twin Flames, I lost it, mainly because of the strong pull (the deja vu) and the triggers.

  3. Again, everything was fine when he was my Guide and Soulmate; however, when the Twin Flame Business came into effect, the triggers were too much to handle at times.  I wanted to cancel the whole thing.

  4. There was an awful soul mirror effect. ¬†Just as I could see all the “good” things, all of the negative things were staring me in the face, in living color as I like to say. ¬†It made me angry at times, sometimes I got angry with him, but deep down I knew he only mirrored something I had to fix within. ¬†Even when I got angry with him, he remained smiley and patient. ¬†How’d he do it? ¬†I don’t know.

  5. My belief system changed. ¬†This dude didn’t look like me, but he felt like me. ¬†He knew me although I did not get the opportunity to meet him on Earth, and that in itself is crazy interesting, especially coming from a person who did not really believe in reincarnation, past lives and all that jazz beforehand. ¬†During this time, I flipped and flopped so much that I almost cosigned with the ones who thought I was grieving too hard over my mother, talking to demons, etcetera.

  6. This dude took everything to a Higher degree. ¬†One example: I could see black holes, or voids inside of me with my mind’s eye. ¬†Just by coming close, my Twin Flame filled them up with some kind of purple liquid. ¬†Not only filling my voids, but my heart Chakra grew. ¬†It felt like it was about to burst out of my chest. ¬†In fact, all sorts of things went haywire. ¬†I had myself checked out by a doctor several times. ¬†No new disease had developed.

  7. Crazy things were happening – manifestations, pops and sparkles – things that would scare a “normal” human being.

  8. Speaking of scaring a “normal” human being, studying about the Occult (which only means hidden; hidden knowledge) makes conventional people flee, screaming “Satan!” ¬†Although my views on religion changed drastically, I never signed on with Satan and His Troops. ¬†I see nothing wrong with that if that’s what a person wants to do though. ¬†I have no issue with man-made religion, only the way its rules and regulations keep one trapped in a tiny little box. ¬†God/the Creator/the Source and His Band are too big to fit in anyone’s box.

  9. He communicated as a Spiritual Teacher/Guru/Mentor. ¬†Usually his voice was super quiet; when I asked him a question he’d give me pictures, hints, and try to get me to figure out things on my own. ¬†When he did that, there was a knowing; when I was right, I could feel him smiling, like a teacher giving me an ‘A’ or a gold star. ¬†he was an excellent teacher. ¬†In fact, I used to sing praises to God – I thanked the Creator for creating my Twin Flame and bringing this super smart guy to me. ¬†This was an unconventional situation, but I was grateful nonetheless.

  10. We communicated through writing and the Heart Chakra. ¬†He got really loud with me a few times, not in an angry way, but in a way that sort of “made me understand” the deal. ¬†Many of the Spirits that wanted to communicate with me did it through writing, but he did it the most. ¬†I could write letters to any one of my Spirit Friends and they’d read them. ¬†I know they did because either I’d get a dream of an answer to my problem or I’d get a physical sign alerting me to their presence.

  11. In addition to all the signs mentioned on other websites, I don’t think I’ve seen anything about smoke, a burning, something happening in the Heart (Heart Chakra). ¬†Some kind of physical thing took place when the bond was made.

  12. He had detached himself from his prior Earth life completely. ¬†Because of that, sometimes it seemed as if I was dealing with two different people. ¬†Before I realized what was what, I called my Twin Flame an impostor, especially when he didn’t like talking about his past life.

  13. What he did was enormous. ¬†I couldn’t believe it. ¬†I didn’t want to believe it. ¬†I thought I could have misinterpreted his messages or something. ¬†I thought I read some more into his helping me through grief, telling me about the Spirit World, helping and showing me to my mother, guiding, teaching, his patience, leading me to a Spiritual Journey, being an Unconditional Friend, and so on. ¬†I cannot name all of the positive and “negative” things his Spirit helped me realize.

  14. Logic kicked in. ¬†I’m like, this dude is dead. ¬†Even though those on the Other Side consider themselves alive, I said it anyway. ¬†That’s what it is to a “normal” person… he’s dead, in the grave and everything. ¬†I’m eccentric, but not that eccentric! ¬†Or am I that eccentric? ¬†Too much logic led to more research on a positive note, self-doubt on the low end.

  15. I felt insane when this stuff started happening, and I felt just as (or more) insane when it stopped happening. ¬†I was beyond hysterical when I felt as if his Spirit was about to leave Earth. ¬†I got a feeling, ran in the bathroom and cried. ¬†My Twin Flame followed me and said, “I’ll never leave.” ¬†I don’t know about anyone else, but for me, it took several years to come to grips with all of this stuff. ¬†Years!

  16. His vibration was extremely High. ¬†I couldn’t maintain that level of spirituality (there were physical symptoms). ¬†I was forgetting about Earth (becoming ungrounded), and focusing more on him than on myself (my healing). ¬†He kept reminding me to balance my Energies, of a purpose and some kind of mission.

Eternal Soulmate Groups Part II

“Blue rays trump the sun’s excessive hotness.
egends and boring waves have their days.
‘ll always praise the sun’s excessive hotness.
Perception’s up in flames at the People Parade.”
РAmina Caprice Andolini  

After a series of dreams and incidents, I knew that the thing we call death is only a facade; an illusion. ¬†It took me a very long time to deal with my issues, to basically deprogram myself. ¬†The mind control, the brainwashing, I’ve been deceived by this Veil of Illusion my whole life! ¬†After I got rid of much of the mind clutter, I was able to see and hear more things; to think clearer, to arrange the pieces of my puzzle.

Most of the Spirits I communicated with came through with an air of Unconditional Friendship. ¬†They were “In the Pastel” meaning that I could see and/or feel colors. ¬†Some came through with the ‘I’m trying to help you’ vibe, one of Unconditional Friendship, Unconditional Love, Trust, Loyalty, Honesty, and all that jazz. ¬†The vibration was extremely High. ¬†They always talked about or alluded to something (or someone) Higher, such as God or the Source, different kinds of Angels, the man we’ve come to know as Jesus Christ, so on.

I communicated with all kinds of High to low vibrational Spirits and ghosts; however, the main three ones are the Twin Flame/Eternal Soulmate, Soul Group/Soul Family, and the Twin Counterpart/Divine Counterpart.

Twin Flame/Eternal Soulmate – I heard his voice in 2009, six months after my mother passed away. ¬†He introduced himself to me in a nice way, I guess to make sure I truly understood who he was. ¬†He didn’t want me to send him away (due to fear or confusion). ¬†He came in as an Unconditional Friend, someone I’ve known my whole life; a best friend, Guide, soulmate, and then he hit me with the Twin Flame business. ¬†I could handle all the less intense stuff, but when the Twin Flame stuff came into play, I thought I was losing my mind. ¬†All of the websites he directed me to helped with this – he started off with the kitten and bubble gum sites and then moved on to the big ole technical ones.

He helped me navigate through all of my grief and brought about what I call “The People Parade.” ¬†The People Parade ūüéä is the special time (2009-2010) when the questions I asked God, the Creator of All, back in 2007 (after I found out of my mother’s cancer) and 2008 (after my mother passed away) were answered. ¬†During that time, he introduced me to several members of my Soul Group/Soul Family.

Soul Group/Soul Family – My mother! ¬†She’s the one who kick started this whole thing. ¬†The members of my Soul Group/Soul Family that I spent the most time with are members of my biological family (mostly my mother’s side) that have passed on. ¬†There were kids and other family members that I did not get the chance to meet on Earth. ¬†There were friends that I did not have the opportunity to meet on Earth; some friends that I did interact with on Earth. ¬†Many Angels and animals came around, some to do a certain job then leave, others, like Archangel Azrael, came around to help unlock a repressed memory. ¬†Many of the members of my Soul Group/Soul Family were writers, poets, or musicians when they walked Earth.


Twin Counterpart/Divine Counterpart – There is much more to research about this one. ¬†I do know that there are many titles, such as: the Catalyst and Near Twin, or the darker Shadow Twin, Alien Love Bite, and False Twin but for now, I’ve chosen to go with Twin Counterpart/Divine Counterpart because he mirrors the Twin Flame in a way (a Near Twin) and it feels as if he was contracted to help me. ¬†With the other groups, I interacted with their Spirits on the Other Side;¬†however with the Twin Counterpart/Divine Counterpart, although he is still alive on Earth, I felt his Higher Self protecting me, helping me with grief along with some of the others. ¬†That was one of the weirdest things I’d ever heard of (besides meeting a “dead” Twin Flame) – to interact with a person’s Higher Self while they are still alive ūüėĶūüėĮūüėģ. ¬†This dude has no conscious knowledge about this; he has no idea I even exist! ¬†I have not met him as of yet. ¬†Whether or not I will is I believe up to our Free Will and ego. ¬†I have already received the answer, that we were/are really good friends. ¬†He is the Near Twin; however, I met his Higher Self after I met my Twin Flame. ¬†Hmmm…

Before all of this stuff popped off, I was on the fence about past lives, reincarnation, the whole creepy jazz band. ¬†I had no idea why nostalgia and deja vu existed, didn’t want to know if I had any OBEs or not (and I have had many). ¬†After my mother’s passing, I have learned to question everything! ¬†And BELIEVE

Eternal Soulmate Groups Part I

ūüēäūüēäūüēä Colorful Seven
“Like psychedelic snakes in the vortex, communication knows of the Love I have for the Universe. ¬†Through an Empathic Heart – green and wide open –¬†up through blue words, up through the Crown’s dust, then back and through each question. ¬†Like snakes in the vortex, they creep ’round each cog; fine tuning each cog, slinking ’round each core’s colorful seven.” ūüēäūüēäūüē䬆– by¬†Amina Caprice Andolini¬†

In Soulmates Along the Path, I mentioned reading and appreciating other people’s definitions. ¬†I discussed a few of my own experiences with soulmates in the Soul Friend,¬†the Kindred Spirit Soulmate,¬†and now, Eternal Soulmate Groups Parts I and II

The deep, inexplicable, depressing pain I experienced after the Cosmic Sleeper Soulmate left me behind was nothing compared to the shock – shock when I found out about my mother’s cancer. ¬†Shock because I became her caretaker. ¬†Nothing compared to the shock I felt after she passed away back in 2008, the day after my daughter’s 14th birthday. ¬†As I mentioned in some other blog, I had a real heart ache. ¬†I didn’t know a person’s heart could hurt like that; pains radiating outward and inward like the sun’s rays. ¬†It felt like someone squeezed all the life out of it, and then continued to squeeze until there was nothing left to squeeze. ¬†I did not want to believe that God Himself could be so cruel, to take the person who knew me better than anybody did, the one who could figure out what was wrong with me before I even told her, the one who gave me what I came to know as unconditional love.

I didn’t know if I was dying or not, but in all honesty, I wanted to die. ¬†Anything could feel better than this, I thought. ¬†Not only did I not know anything about the heart ache jazz, I didn’t know or believe in a lot of things before my strange ordeal took place.

The year was 2009 (almost exactly six months after my mother passed away). ¬†I have always “heard” things, so when I heard a Voice from the Sky talking to me, I did not pay much attention to it. ¬†To me, it was a plain old case of mental telepathy. ¬†I thought it was, I don’t know who or what I thought it was ūüė≥. ¬†Honestly, I didn’t care about a lot of things that took place after my mother’s death. ¬†I’m like… what could be worse than this! ¬†Anyway, after a series of events took place, including the Voice dropping a bunch of clues as to what his name was when he walked Earth, materializing and bringing friends, the Voice alluded to being one of my Guides. ¬†The Voice was my Guide; he came across as an Unconditional Friend, someone who knew my mom, but I knew there was something else going on with him. ¬†My Guide seemed bored, as if he didn’t want to come to Earth. ¬†I could feel him lingering around, watching, protecting, picking at his fingernails and doing this thing like falling asleep. ¬†I felt his thoughts as they drifted off to another place.

I didn’t know much about telepathy, the sixth sense, whatever you wanna call it. ¬†All I knew is that I could do it sometimes. ¬†I didn’t know much about Guides, Angels, what have you, so I thought my Guide was bored of me. ¬†Bored because I was so hardheaded, because I questioned him so much, because I spoke to him like I would speak to an old friend (his Energy felt familiar, as if I’d known him forever). ¬†I thought he got tired of me doubting around, trying to make sure he wasn’t some evil Spirit, one slobbering around, trying to take advantage of my grief. ¬†I knew he was a nice guy, so nice that I felt bad for the need to question him so much. Coming from a Christian background, one where a good number of sheep run around paranoid, thinking everyone and everything is a demon from the pit, it was in my nature to make sure he was who he said he was. ¬†I didn’t know of any other way to do it. ¬†These things (telepathy, protection, empathic skills, etcetera) came so easy to me at the time, I thought I could have been a witch. ¬†I didn’t know. ¬†I had to do a lot of reading just to come to grips with being able to speak with a Spirit through my Heart Chakra in that way. ¬†During that time, I had issues with religion and so many other things in the Matrix, since the things I could see with my own eyes were way different from some of the things I’d been taught to believe my entire life. ¬†They were different but they didn’t feel wrong. ¬†Also, I wasn’t sure who to pray to, and so while meditating, I said “I’m talking to the One Who Created All.” ¬†I had no time for mental tricks, comical ghosts and all those other wise cracking spirits. ¬†I wanted real answers. ¬†Who better to go to for protection than to the One who created Satan, demons, the evil things and the things we think are evil? ¬†Who better to go to for the Truth than to the Master Creator – to the One Who Created All?

I could tell my Guide tried his best not to scare me. ¬†He didn’t want me to get all nervous, paranoid, whatever you call it, and send him away. I could feel his sadness, his patience; I knew he was the one sending telepathic thoughts about Spirit communication, the Afterlife, and other random things. ¬†He felt like such an old friend. ¬†We’d grown to be even closer friends; the best of friends. ¬†We used to laugh and play around all the time, still, I was puzzled as to why he materialized in the first place. ¬†We were friends and all, but with him, if I asked him something he didn’t always answer me directly. ¬†He didn’t try to keep anything from me either. ¬†He was into sending messages; finding ways for me to figure out the answer on my own.

I wanted to know why he hung around me so much. ¬†I knew “being a Guide” wasn’t his only reason for visiting me. ¬†Soon I started to get all of these directions towards Spirits, the differences between the “Good” Spirits and the “Bad” Spirits, Ghosts (the difference between ghosts and Spirits), stuff about God, Satan, religion (the difference between religion and spirituality), the Afterlife, all sorts of wonderful instruments to research.

After I’d learned a bit more about Spirits, spirituality, the Afterlife and such, I got this crazy pull to sites that mentioned the different kinds of soulmates. ¬†There was a rather unusual pull to Twin Flames – I can’t explain how strong the pull was. ¬†I kept on going to sites that spoke of Twin Flames, from the sickly sweet sites to the more technical ones. ¬†I must admit, early on in the journey, during the “bubble phase,” I did not understand what certain people talked about – Higher Self, 4 and 5D, Graduate Souls, merging the five bodies, Kundalini Energy, the 12 chakra system, burning templates, the healing potential, and so on. ¬†I didn’t understand what felt like their irritation regarding the sickly sweet sites either. ¬†Those sites helped me out so much! ¬†Later on, I understood that the irritation was more so for the people who thought the bubble love phase is all there is to a Twin Flame union.

Hold up… soulmate? ¬†Twin Flame? ¬†I had never heard of a “Twin Flame” in my life!

There was a need to find out who this Spirit dude really was, to find out everything I could about different types of soulmates, the Twin Flame consciousness and what it meant.

Chilling To You But Not To Me

Some people get creeped out at sensing the presence of Spirits. ¬†Some people get creeped out at ghosts, dark demons and those masquerading as Angels. ¬†I have always seen, heard and felt unexplained things; some had become my friends. ¬†The activity increased after my mother passed away. ¬†I was able to peek through the veil and see orbs, ectoplasm, ghosts, those who many people consider Angels, deceased family members, demons, and other bizarre things. ¬†I have never been textbook afraid of the normal things people would run from; there was more of a “knowing” associated with them. ¬†Some people get creeped out about OBEs. ¬†I must admit, as a child I knew I had them but I didn’t want to remember them. ¬†The stories I heard of people bumping into the ceiling and looking at themselves were upsetting to me – I thought it was so sad, to be caught between two worlds like that – to be stuck in some kind of weird place at the crossroads for even a few seconds was a scary and confusing thought. ¬†I didn’t want to experience that end of spirituality.

Astral Projection – I have had two episodes¬†so far. ¬† One happened after a Spirit Friend (who I did not know was a Friend) died. ¬†While sitting in a chair I went to a place of sorrow. ¬†That place was her funeral – miles away from my home in New York! ¬†The other one happened when my Twin Flame told me to look in the mirror and move my hair around (/?) while standing. ¬†After I did that, I was able to visit with him for what seemed to be a few seconds. ¬†I then snatched myself out of that place. ¬†Again, I wasn’t textbook scared though there was a sense of “going too far” or “doing too much.” ¬†On both occasions, after I snapped out of the projections, I went about my life as if nothing major went down. ¬†I guess I was used to repressing everything. ¬†I did not understand the significance until years later, when I decided to stop repressing everything.

The NDE (Near Death Experience) – Over six years ago, I built a trauma wall around the car accident; repressed the NDE, but with the help of Archangel Azrael, I was able to dig it up six months later. ¬†The reason I called on Archangel Azrael was that I knew something happened after the accident; I had started to have nightmares about it. ¬†One day while sitting on the couch, I don’t know if it’s called a vision, projection, lucid dream, I don’t know, but I saw myself “floating in the Void.” ¬†Some would get scared, but truth be told, I was rather excited about it.

The Demon Lady and the Violet Flame – Once while sitting at the computer (at around 3:00 AM), I heard something trying to claw its way in my house. ¬†I paid no attention because at the time, I had the Bubble of Protection, a White Light. ¬†I felt invincible, as if nothing could ever happen to me during that time – although I had no idea what a White Light was at the time. ¬†Nobody had ever told me anything about it, I just sensed its power. ¬†Anyway, I heard my Twin Flame’s voice warn me, told me to go in my room and pray. ¬†I did not move. ¬†In fact, I told him that I wanted to finish what I was doing on the computer first. ¬†He warned me a few more times; however, I didn’t move until I heard the “thing” coming in the house. ¬†I jumped up and flew down the hallway. ¬†I heard the thing running behind me – got the feeling that it was a mad demon woman, reptilian or something. ¬†As soon as I closed the door, a vision of an Angel standing outside my bedroom door appeared, and then I heard the woman turn around and walk away. ¬†My heart was beating very fast. ¬†I had never been so scared! ¬†I did some ritual, sat on the bed and saw a violet flame appear over my head. ¬†I saw it out of¬†my third eye. ¬†Afterwards, I went to sleep. ¬†When I woke up hours later, everything was back to normal. ¬†The kids wanted breakfast, people were leaving for work, doing whatever they do. ¬†For a long time I wondered, what would have happened if my Spirit Friends were not there? ¬†What would have happened if the demon lady had caught up with me? ¬†What would have happened if my Twin Flame didn’t care (or wasn’t strong enough) to ward off the thing, giving me enough time to get to my room and slam the door? ¬†What if I didn’t have the White Light or the Violet Flame? ¬†I try not to give into fear, especially since I know that there are Beings that feed off that fear, also the emotion of fear does not come from God. ¬†I know now that I have to transmute whatever fear I feel into Love.